Blog

Background Floor Shadow Wall Kitchen Concrete White Texture Light Texture Abstract Mockup Product Marble Room Studio Display Plant Cement 3d Bg Minimal Shelft Bar Silhouette Leaves Backdrop Vintage.

<p>Shef Shewach, at the young age of 4 years old, drops some philosophical wisdom. Could it have been a prophetic recipe for life? Or just a snarky kid foreshadowing his anti-authority, anti-establishment ways?</p><h3 id="figure-ewc6zss14lywshltz"><img id="ewc6zss14lywshltz" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/2ao6nej8ZA0SNHp6rJiNhdfkR7or6Sc7YHKe9nDFyQ6XaNs1o0DiogxpmBmAD5Of.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl selected" style="aspect-ratio: 3/2; object-position: undefined undefined;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="3:2" data-caption="Nothin' recipe by Steven Shewach, 4 years old" data-positionx="undefined" data-positiony="undefined" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/2ao6nej8ZA0SNHp6rJiNhdfkR7or6Sc7YHKe9nDFyQ6XaNs1o0DiogxpmBmAD5Of.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 3/2; object-position: undefined undefined;" data-mce-selected="1">Buddha or Bastard?<br></h3><p>Not following the herd apparently seems to have been an attribute of mine since an early age. In really looking at my response, I did answer the teacher's two-part question using the recipe framework, yet I completely ignored the first part and substituted (pun intended) the second part with a non-food, esoteric, possibly prophetic, witty, and decidedly philosophic rendition of xxxx</p><p><br></p>

Nothin'...... A Recipe for Life

<h3>Nepal, a truly special nation filled with awe-inspiring mountains, warm and generous people, and buzzing with spirituality.</h3><h2>Nomad-ing to Nepal</h2><p><br>It seemed as remote a possibility as your vast, towering peaks that I would ever walk your dusty, chock-holed streets with motorcycles, cars and open-doored vans careening and whizzing by an inch from my hips or trek your endless valleys of glacier enshrouded mountains; the tallest in the world. To breathe your crisp, oxygen-thin air at nearly 18,000 feet, on two different treks; to steep in Nepali (and related Tibetan and Indian) culture and delve deeper into spiritual practices; you seemed too far, too remote and too exotic.</p><figure id="figure-ic8aeuc6a3lyd6yezs" data-full-width=""><img id="ic8aeuc6a3lyd6yezs" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/23oMW1dTZeZKhya3G6tDeR0BFp7LONX4GfGtIid4CQo8OzQOanW1N1gXjCu0LQxH.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: 50% 55%;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="Tengboche Monastery on the Everest Base Camp Trek. Photo by Steven Shewach. " data-positionx="50%" data-positiony="55%" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/23oMW1dTZeZKhya3G6tDeR0BFp7LONX4GfGtIid4CQo8OzQOanW1N1gXjCu0LQxH.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: 50% 55%;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Tengboche Monastery on the Everest Base Camp Trek. Photo by Steven Shewach.</figcaption></figure><p>Fate and destiny — they too, are powerful forces, and we were fused together like lightening that meets the sky from the electrically charged ground. You were, without me realizing it, what I needed after months of increasing heat while traveling around Southeast Asia and mending a broken heart. I’ve often used physical activity for catharsis; especially a healing heart — it knows no better affirmation of aliveness than it beating forcefully, working in concert with my body to take me up and over mountains, along steep, craggy trails, and precarious suspension bridges high over silty, frigid glacial rivers; and yours holds the world’s best mountains and the best trekking. Additionally, the physical activity is meditative, one step at a time; bringing me to the present with precise focus and attention—as there were some dangerous landslide areas and narrow trails with extreme exposure of thousands of feet between my feet and the abyss below.</p><figure id="figure-u0w1btm4ylyd71qk3"><iframe id="u0w1btm4ylyd71qk3" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/GXN2g5U13A4" class="w-full bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" allowfullscreen="" data-url="https://youtu.be/GXN2g5U13A4" data-corners="default" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/GXN2g5U13A4" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></iframe></figure><p>And as a man with no permanent home, mountains, are familiar to me; they’re my proxy home. And they always beckon me to climb them, scamper on them, and revere them. And yours are the most beautiful in the world. There was no better place for me to be than here, ensconced in your lore, awe, and gleaming peaks, at this time in my life.</p><h2>Nuzzling into Nepal</h2><p><br>I’m approaching two years of nomad-ing, and you are the third country where I’ve stayed for the longest period, three months (the others were Brazil and Colombia). There are some countries, despite never coming close to even seeing a fraction of no matter how long I’m there, that I don’t have a desire to return to — you are not one of them. I plan to return for more trekking and more Buddhist study and practice.</p><figure id="figure-8qiowax2eqlyd73i9y" data-full-width=""><img id="8qiowax2eqlyd73i9y" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/10zvSLBGWloQRBXk2jzm1eSZ2jbH22qYDxJims7RbF3ZGMtlJCeGrArG0LZHfzlr.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: undefined% 85%;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="1:1" data-caption="Fruit bicycles on the streets of Kathmandu. Photo by Steven Shewach. " data-positionx="undefined%" data-positiony="85%" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/10zvSLBGWloQRBXk2jzm1eSZ2jbH22qYDxJims7RbF3ZGMtlJCeGrArG0LZHfzlr.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: undefined% 85%;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Fruit bicycles on the streets of Kathmandu. Photo by Steven Shewach.</figcaption></figure><p>Initially I recoiled from your capital city, the mayhem and frantic energy of Kathmandu, and the most visceral ‘developing nation-ness’ country I’ve encountered so far — and yearned to be in your majestic high altitude wilderness. And once I got there, you did not disappoint. After 9 days of trekking and climbing ever higher, to be standing in the shadows of the infamous Khumbu Icefall at Everest Base Camp and the next morning watch the sunrise over Everest’s peak, while at the highest elevation I have ever stood, was a dream come true. Another three days trekking back to Lukla, after which I took up residence in the idyllic lakeside town of Pokhara in the shadows of the Himalayas for over a month reading, reflecting, writing, drinking honey lattes, meandering, and deepening my spiritual connection.</p><figure id="figure-zxuyzm7wuilyd78tmu" data-full-width=""><img id="zxuyzm7wuilyd78tmu" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/17ioh9ofYTuL5oP2oi3ZPGravnQm3MxWmYnjjQNCtT03SPeSJs5Di1x093Daju2I.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="Everest Base Camp at 17,598 feet (5364 meters) Photo by Steven Shewach." data-positionx="undefined" data-positiony="undefined" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/17ioh9ofYTuL5oP2oi3ZPGravnQm3MxWmYnjjQNCtT03SPeSJs5Di1x093Daju2I.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Everest Base Camp at 17,598 feet (5364 meters) Photo by Steven Shewach.</figcaption></figure><p>And your wispy winds whispered again, calling me back to your unrivaled mountains and surging rivers. On my second trek, I went solo, no companions and no guide for 13 days; a physical and emotional journey that filled my heart — and my whole body and soul — with strength and power. Undeniably verifying my life force, vitality, independence, and confidence. Between both treks, I hiked 235 miles and climbed, mostly at altitude, the equivalent of 3,741 floors; as a reference, the world’s tallest building, the Burj Khalifa in Dubai, is 135 floors — so I climbed to the top of it the equivalent of 23 times.</p><p>Followed by more time in Pokhara participating in my first yoga retreat, a week of meditation and authentic yoga practice, eating Ayurvedic food while overlooking, on the hills from high above, down to gorgeous Phewa Lake, the shores which frame the most beautiful sunsets, where I have walked countless times; often stopping in for a chat and a chaat at my favorite chaat stand; and playing with the ever present street dogs. And extending my foray into the metaphysical and energy healing realms by becoming a Level I Reiki Contact Healer.</p><figure id="figure-r7hbcmfhoklyd7avo2" data-full-width=""><img id="r7hbcmfhoklyd7avo2" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/3Z31E6q9Jae2OxGs7O6Fb5ipeZ0Qq8WYAiFlZiGkp3citYegtohu98ceHE6OC4kN.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: 50% 55%;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="1:1" data-caption="All photos by Steven Shewach. Clockwise: Top (l-r) EBC trek monastery | Thali dinner | Sadhu's in Kathmandu. Middle (l-r) Honey latte | bicycle heap | one of many suspension bridges on EBC trek. Bottom (l-r) Boudhanath Stupa, largest in Nepal | Flower offering | In the plains, coming down from EBC." data-positionx="50%" data-positiony="55%" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/3Z31E6q9Jae2OxGs7O6Fb5ipeZ0Qq8WYAiFlZiGkp3citYegtohu98ceHE6OC4kN.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: 50% 55%;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">All photos by Steven Shewach. Clockwise: Top (l-r) EBC trek monastery | Thali dinner | Sadhu's in Kathmandu. Middle (l-r) Honey latte | bicycle heap | one of many suspension bridges on EBC trek. Bottom (l-r) Boudhanath Stupa, largest in Nepal | Flower offering | In the plains, coming down from EBC.</figcaption></figure><figure id="figure-xq8vbpu7eelyd7ej0d" data-full-width=""><img id="xq8vbpu7eelyd7ej0d" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/319GoiIFtOzxtfLYcJVqi7sdZQNoD3y6r6PSiWTzl2dbpZiIaikXvWid47JZmuyD.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="Canoes on Phewa Lake, Pokhara, Nepal. Photo by Steven Shewach" data-positionx="undefined" data-positiony="undefined" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/319GoiIFtOzxtfLYcJVqi7sdZQNoD3y6r6PSiWTzl2dbpZiIaikXvWid47JZmuyD.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Canoes on Phewa Lake, Pokhara, Nepal. Photo by Steven Shewach</figcaption></figure><p>Upon returning to the Kathmandu area, I found it much more palatable, perhaps because it’s low tourist season or because the rains curbed the dust, but I believe it’s because I found a rhythm in the chaos that I can dance insid. I became acclimatized, as I did to the thin, high altitude air, to what, at first glance, is chaos, but when more closely observed is, in fact, a dance of how people share spaces; sharing the trail with caravans of pointy-horned yaks and trekkers, and sharing rickety, bumpy, foot-swallowing narrow roads with cars, motorcycles, bicycles, rickshaws, and pedestrians.</p><figure id="figure-rrm0hr9ogplyd7fmn5" data-full-width=""><img id="rrm0hr9ogplyd7fmn5" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/29dleAEqJEUvkGgZizsU1of9DMdqjAAO61VamSftuDpifUJIMA7qetlNmNRckTzG.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: undefined undefined;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="1:1" data-caption="Photo by Steven Shewach" data-positionx="undefined" data-positiony="undefined" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/29dleAEqJEUvkGgZizsU1of9DMdqjAAO61VamSftuDpifUJIMA7qetlNmNRckTzG.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: undefined undefined;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Photo by Steven Shewach</figcaption></figure><p>While back in Kathmandu I initially went for three days, which turned into six, for a sampler experience at a Buddhist monastery on a hilltop in Kathmandu where, prior to arriving, and because of the recent opening, softening, and deepening of my spiritual energy, I was primed for an impactful experience. And I got one. This, despite staying there during a non-programming period. Beyond a couple of dharma talks there was no course or set schedule. But the energy there vibrates from everywhere back into oneself; where the silence, external disconnection and subsequent self-reflecting either makes you feel unsettlingly uncomfortable, almost frantic; or you surrender to it. I leaned in and welcomed the opening of some big cracks to my illusionary identity’s shell, which then triggered apprehension to what will be revealed underneath those cracks when it falls away completely. And I’m using this momentum to continue focusing my energy on cracking the shell further, revealing a lighter, freer, unattached malleable identity, including when I attend a silent 10-day Buddhism course in India next month.</p><h2>No Place is Nirvana</h2><p><br>I enjoyed your vegetarian-friendly food, experiencing many forms of spa and Ayurvedic treatments including various types of massages, singing bowl meditations, and my favorite, Shirodhara, a form of Ayurveda therapy that involves gently pouring specially formulated hot oil over the forehead onto the third eye for 30 minutes, while getting a head massage—so divine; all following an hour-long body oil massage. As well as the simplest of drinks, yet not found anywhere else I’ve traveled, the venerable honey latte. I also grew mostly accustomed to your frequent electrical power cuts and perfected using a squat toilet.</p><figure id="figure-azzcwsxlgqlyd7hz81" data-full-width=""><img id="azzcwsxlgqlyd7hz81" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/1eEvSFEGjDAjtpCrWfhwlOfUXoBrPN3NWTzIvK9tAUyrD5QEs0RRIp4A1JLC7CQq.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="Purna Yoga Retreat, Pokhara, Nepal. Photo by Steven Shewach." data-positionx="undefined" data-positiony="undefined" data-fullwidth="true" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/1eEvSFEGjDAjtpCrWfhwlOfUXoBrPN3NWTzIvK9tAUyrD5QEs0RRIp4A1JLC7CQq.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Purna Yoga Retreat, Pokhara, Nepal. Photo by Steven Shewach.</figcaption></figure><p>Conversely, I haven’t quite gotten used to the constant loud throat clearing, that drums up deep in the chest…..and then is released with a ‘chwoooooottch’, immediately followed by spitting a wad of phlegm—by any person, so long as they are outside or near a doorway or window; and its sibling activity of nose ‘snot rocketing’, one per nostril, followed by a mucous-filled hand wipe to the pants. Some say these bodily actions are because of the dirty, dusty air pollution, or from chewing betel leaf (I didn’t see this as it’s very noticeable giving the chewer bright red teeth, lips and saliva), or dispelling bad spirits from the body. Regardless, it’s pretty unsavory—this coming from a guy who loves belching out a good burp now and then, but there’s no bodily fluid being projected onto the street nearly or actually hitting someone on the leg, shoe or shoulder.</p><p>And I got a chance to practice plenty of patience with the terminally slow wifi; when it’s working due to those pesky power outages. By far, the most disturbing thing I could not wrap my head around is the litter. It’s everywhere, often burning and releasing toxic smoke. I repeatedly saw men, women and children toss litter onto the street, out of a bus, wherever—without any hesitation; it’s completely normal behavior. Best I can guess, is as a country, you have other large scale infrastructure issues to deal with than trash on the ground. Politically, you’ve been through the ringer and are trying to stabilize yourself and eventually the glaring trash will have to be dealt with.</p><h2>Grow with Grace</h2><p><br>You are as much as a jewel of natural beauty as you are the people who inhabit your borders. Overall my experience interacting with Nepalis showed a gracious, friendly, helpful, spiritual, humble, hardworking amalgamation of people who live life honestly and with integrity; and who welcome us foreigners to explore your unique landscape and culture.</p><p>Like so many others, my experience here in this special place has been one overflowing with spirituality, unbounded natural beauty and a rawness that I’ve not experienced elsewhere.</p><p>Nepal, keep growing, while protecting your natural and cultural uniqueness.</p><p>See you soon.</p><figure id="figure-50k5fy60svlyd7jblp"data-full-width><img id="50k5fy60svlyd7jblp" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/2cZXjcl7N1Rn3HnZtpFNV2OCfgUe2DBzERs2yCL7PdpIGXwT69V83gFH4ToO2rhQ.jpg" alt="" title="" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: 45% 85%;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="Somewhere along the Everest Base Camp Trek. Photo by Steven Shewach." data-positionX="45%" data-positionY="85%" data-fullWidth="true"/><figcaption class="body-normal text-gray-500 mt-2">Somewhere along the Everest Base Camp Trek. Photo by Steven Shewach.</figcaption></figure><p><br></p>

3 Months in Nepal: Ascendance, Adventure, and Acceptance

<h3>Before the phrase Toxic Positivity was coined, I wrote this piece. It still resonates today. We gotta make sure the Positivity Punks know that they're full of it. And instead acknowledge the natural ebb and flow of emotions.</h3><p>Which of the following statements have you heard before? I mean actually heard in person, directly to your face. Whence upon hearing it your first thought included some form of bodily injury; probably a big punch to their stupid face because that’s precisely where this banal, deflating, and confoundedly condescending commandment just came from.</p><h3>Commandments like:</h3><p><strong>Just Do It</strong> thanks Nike — actually thanks to their agency W + K, a local ad agency that’s one of the world’s best)<br><strong>Stay Positive</strong> or any other iteration with the prefix word such as: be, act, or think<br><strong>It’ll be alright</strong> - oh, really—how do you know?)<br><strong>Don’t worry</strong> - this may be the grand pooba of them all</p><h3>Dissed by the Disingenuous</h3><p><br><strong>Q</strong>: How infuriating is it to have someone tell you that in an instant you can and should just pick up the pieces of your miserable life and move on? It’s ‘just that easy’ is their smarmy implication.</p><p><strong>A</strong>: It’s not only freaking infuriating; it’s the last thing you want to hear. Who are they to crash your pity party?</p><p>Moreover, how dare they sidle up to you on their high horse of personal development mastery and try to strike down your wall of misery with their simplistic, catty, and truly disingenuous (and probably unsolicited) counsel.</p><h3>Old Me — Thought Process</h3><p><br>(in response to their statements from above)<br>- Um, I would if I could you dumb fuck.<br>- Do you think I like feeling miserable?<br>- Do you think I enjoy having my marriage fall apart right in front of me? (or whatever part of your life is amiss)<br>- Do you think I want this shit?<br>- Do you think I don’t want to have less drama and problems in my life?</p><h3>The Conundrum of the Positivity Jerks</h3><p><br>Why do these perma-smiling, glowing aura, tippy-toe flitting to and fro assholes, with their endless and oozing positivity, spout their incessant messages of simplified condescension, to the misery-ridden in such a disdainful, un-empathetic manner?</p><p>Who am I talking about? It’s not just from the slew of well-known leaders in the self-help space. It could be from someone in your family, your spouse, or perhaps a friend. Or maybe someone from work — either a coworker or your boss. These forever positive people (from here on out called <strong>Forever Pozzos</strong>) are amassing in numbers; they’re everywhere. And they’re spewing their insincere message to precisely the wrong people.</p><h3>The Forever Pozzo Categories</h3><p><br><strong>The Gurus</strong> (either self-proclaimed or actual as measured by name recognition, book sales, etc.)</p><p>These folks are bastions of slickness and certainly appear to always have (and likely always have had) their shit totally together. Without naming names, you know these folks — with their perky smiles, endlessly spouting little fuck nuggets of supposed wisdom. It’s not that I don’t think they’re not genuinely happy; I’m sure they are. And their message clearly resonates with some faction of people or otherwise they wouldn’t be as popular as they are. But their message very likely does not resonate, if they ever hear it at all, with people who are in such a difficult place, that if or when they do hear it, their words hit them like an assault. These gurus are like the politicians of personal growth; masters of blowing smoke.</p><p><strong>The Movements</strong> (these may or may not have the ‘face’ of a Positivity Guru directly behind them)</p><p>Troll Facebook and you’ll see groups, with massive followings by the way, who post endless articles with titles like (these are real):</p><p>12 Rules for Being Beautifully Human (gag)</p><p>10 Gifts You Deserve to Give Yourself (cheese-fest)</p><p>6 Tips to Help You Free Yourself from Your Fearful Thoughts (eh, maybe)</p><p>5 Simple but Often Forgotten Ways to Keep a Relationship Strong (like ‘don’t be a dick’)</p><p>9 Things You Need to Stop Caring About (like this stupid article of yours)</p><p>How many fucking lists can these people rehash before they sound like broken records? They use lists because everyone else does. Because the default of the human mind generally prefers having a nice palatable recipe for how to deal with things we don’t understand. The ‘follow the road map’ approach certainly is well worn because it attracts and speaks to people. Full disclosure, I use a 4-step system called <a data-mce-href="https://vitamen.men/blog/taming-training-wrangle-your-life-and-then-relax" href="https://vitamen.men/blog/taming-training-wrangle-your-life-and-then-relax">Mind Taming Training</a> to help men pierce their perceptions. Trust me, I fought it for a while but to compete I needed to acquiesce and create such a system. Buddha help me though, for I will not succumb to the ‘7 Reasons You’re a Flaming Schmuck‘ list after list after list formula.</p><p>I feel I must also share that when I first started my business and was figuring out my voice, my brand, my tone, and my audience — I experimented with social media posts that included a few of those awful, shallow lists of how to make your life better until I realized the people who like this drivel already buy into it. They love it and reading more of it reinforces their already positively-oriented perception. This is fine. They’re happy, lovely people. Many of them are my friends and they see the world differently (read more positively) from the persistently miserable people. Oh, and it looks like I’ve settled into a voice that’s a cross between Andrew Dice Clay and Wayne Dyer.</p><h3>The Scientists</h3><p>Oh yes, these folks are legit, right? That’s for you to decide. Most of them, however, although they study the human brain, emotions, and the like with great skill, they themselves often haven’t directly experienced the change they peddle can occur if you follow their prescriptive, scientifically proven process. Many people will only believe stuff published by a person with a bunch of letters after their name, as if this somehow automatically confers truth or validity.</p><h3>Answering the Conundrum of the Positivity Jerks</h3><p><br>Back to answering the conundrum of why the <em>Forever Pozzo’s</em> drop their simplistic asshole-isms all day long, especially to the emotionally downtrodden — when they least want it or need it?</p><p>The answer, as far as I’ve surmised, is because the folks I’ve been blasting since I started this post, fall into one of two categories of the positivity messengers. They’re <em>Forever Pozzos</em>. And they are far, far away from the reformed <em>Negative Lens</em> people.</p><p>For the <em>Forever Pozzos</em>, their whole lives have been lived from a perspective that defaults to a positivity orientation. No matter the people, situations, and events they manifest or that comes their way — everything is received and processed through a positivity lens. How could they possibly understand; I mean truly, deeply, empathically; the plight of the <em>Negative Lens</em> people? They can’t. And that’s why the <em>Negative Lens</em> people have such a visceral reaction to them. The default perception void is too wide to bridge these two reality lenses. That’s where the <em>Negative Lens Reformers</em> like me come in.</p><h3>The Plight of Negative Lens People</h3><p><br>So the <em>Negative Lens</em> people, of which I’m a former member of, will continue to choose to perceive the world through a negative lens for as long as they feel it serves them. There’s only two outcomes for us.</p><p>1. Dig in over the decades and shore up our negative lens, build up our walls, keep people away from ever really connecting with us (and us to them), and maintain a constant, vigilant watch over the world-at-large, which seeks to screw us over any chance it gets — and launch preemptive strikes at will.</p><p>2. Or get to a point where we know something is not right; knowing there may be another way to experience life and really wondering, to the point of decisive action, if the <em>Forever Pozzos</em> are legit or not. And most importantly, if us <em>Negative Lens</em> people have any possibility of becoming a full-tilt (or even partial) <em>Forever Pozzo</em>.</p><h3>Time to Come Clean With You</h3><p><br>1. The Positivity Gurus I’m suggesting are so unempathetic, the <em>Forever Pozzos</em>, simply do not have any direct experience and dole out their message from the only perspective they’ve ever known. So they’re not really jerks, but they are un-empathetic and they serve as massive emotional triggers to the <em>Negative Lens</em> crowd. I guess you could say it’s good for them to be exposed to such positive people.</p><p>2. and………I agree with them. Gasp! Gulp! <em>Forever Pozzo’s</em> suggestions/messages/lists/programs packaged up in such seemingly simplistic nuggets are all based on shared knowledge consisting of elements from ancient wisdom teachings, psychology, neuroscience, and other related disciplines. It’s their pompous delivery that alienates the people who need their words of wisdom the most.</p><p>3. Yes — I often refer to myself as an ex-asshole who had the Big Insight and functionally changed the neural pathways of my brain towards a positivity lens. I know I’m far from being the first or last person to go through a personal awakening or personal transformation, or whatever you want to call it. There’s nothing particularly special about it when you think of the sheer scale of other people who this has and will happen to.</p><h3>It’s All About To Whom and How the Message is Delivered</h3><p><br>I’m making a very deliberate choice to leverage Old Me and New Me. I remember, because I lived it for decades — the chronic misery, frustration, angst, and resentment — by which I experienced the world. And I know, based on my own direct experience and those who’ve had similar experiences, a person absolutely can rewire their brain to default to a positivity lens. The outcome of which is a life where you Love More and Hurt Less™ and your relationships are a source of love and energy; not a source of resentment, anger, and resentment.</p><h3>Who’s Got Your Back?</h3><p>Someone Who’s Been There<br>or <br>Someone Who’s Always Been There?</p><p>If you’re someone who, based on what I’ve described here, is a <em>Negative Lens</em> default person and you are in fact wondering if the <em>Forever Pozzos</em> are on to something, then who would you rather connect with:</p><p>1. Someone who’s gone through the transformation from a <em>Negative Lens</em> person to a mostly-<em>Forever Pozzo</em>?<br>2. Someone who’s telling you to just be happy because that’s always been their predisposition and they know nothing of low level chronic depression?<br>3. Someone who has reams of data to prove other people have turned their misery and suffering into inner peace but who haven’t directly experienced fear-based narcissism?<br>4. Someone who’s resurrecting an endless loop of positive-oriented list-based articles with the same old weary images, like silhouettes of someone practicing yoga on a beach, but can’t bring up from their own memory banks decades of feeling miserable and negative?<br><br>Please excuse the gratuitous use of the list above. If you chose #1, let’s talk — or find yourself another reformed <em>Negative Lens</em> person that resonates with you. If you’re curious on becoming a <em>Forever Pozzo</em>; why go it alone?</p>

Hey Positivity Gurus, F**k You! Stop Being So Unempathetic

My Midlife Gap Decade: Retire Retirement and Redefine Midlife

portrait of muscular naked fit strong asian chinese middle age very old man looking at the camera. show his muscle. yellow brown tan skin. healthy concept. white background.

<p>As men age, it becomes increasingly important to prioritize their health and well-being. One of the most effective ways to do this is through regular exercise. Exercise not only helps to maintain a healthy weight and build strength, but it also offers a multitude of other benefits for men over 40.</p><h2>1. Improved Heart Health</h2><p>Regular exercise has been shown to reduce the risk of heart disease, which is a leading cause of death among men over 40. Engaging in cardiovascular activities such as running, swimming, or cycling helps to strengthen the heart muscle, lower blood pressure, and improve overall cardiovascular function.</p><figure id="figure-krktz4cr75lrute2ft"><img id="krktz4cr75lrute2ft" src="https://cdn.durable.co/shutterstock/28DEHUJePd30yIxCaahjzls4xUF71NbDSI3kfiC1J3UaSwisjwo1RarI9sMJR2wt.jpeg" alt="fitness, sport, exercising, training and lifestyle concept - young man doing triceps dip on parallel bars outdoors" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="null" data-positiony="null" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/shutterstock/1dHaouiliUoaCsm0NMj5qGt2hTass2ewx9qgaA4LB7cQMq3vlKUjEUF1rzVwwwW5.jpeg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"></figure><h2>2. Increased Muscle Mass and Bone Density</h2><p>As men age, they naturally begin to lose muscle mass and bone density. However, incorporating strength training exercises into their routine can help to combat this. Weightlifting and resistance training not only increase muscle mass but also promote bone health, reducing the risk of osteoporosis and fractures.</p><figure id="figure-vx1p6r340mlrute2ft"><img id="vx1p6r340mlrute2ft" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1549576490-b0b4831ef60a?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw1fHxtYW4lMjBleGVyY2lzaW5nfGVufDB8fHx8MTcwNjcyNDc5OXww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="people exercising" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="null" data-positiony="null" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1549576490-b0b4831ef60a?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw1fHxtYW4lMjBleGVyY2lzaW5nfGVufDB8fHx8MTcwNjcyNDc5OXww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"></figure><h2>3. Enhanced Mental Health</h2><p>Exercise has a profound impact on mental health, particularly for men over 40 who may be facing increased stress and responsibilities. Engaging in physical activity releases endorphins, which are known as "feel-good" hormones, and can help reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety.</p><figure id="figure-f68ydygmvplrute2ft"><img id="f68ydygmvplrute2ft" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1620147512372-9e00421556bb?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw0Nnx8bWVudGFsJTIwaGVhbHRofGVufDB8fHx8MTcwNjcyNTEwM3ww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="a black and white photo of the word mental health" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="null" data-positiony="null" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1620147512372-9e00421556bb?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw0Nnx8bWVudGFsJTIwaGVhbHRofGVufDB8fHx8MTcwNjcyNTEwM3ww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"></figure><h2>4. Improved Sleep Quality</h2><p>Many men over 40 struggle with sleep disturbances or insomnia. Regular exercise can help regulate sleep patterns and improve overall sleep quality. However, it's important to avoid intense workouts close to bedtime, as they may have the opposite effect.</p><figure id="figure-fnpylnrttvlrute2ft"><img id="fnpylnrttvlrute2ft" src="https://cdn.durable.co/shutterstock/2cjttMRCGEuMdRnqmYb3SX8vi5Z0vpGmS2HjwNZuSADgFMav22lGWBkS122CNiHW.jpeg" alt="man sleeps in the mask for the eyes                              " class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="null" data-positiony="null" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/shutterstock/1bDcUdleBokrHtJxo1XsFeB4rCwi4ZQylPz5XjMJJn0vpAgCgkN9rLR4NheEEcUQ.jpeg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"></figure><h2>5. Reduced Risk of Chronic Diseases</h2><p>Exercise has been shown to reduce the risk of developing chronic diseases such as diabetes, certain types of cancer, and metabolic syndrome. By maintaining a regular exercise routine, men over 40 can significantly improve their overall health and longevity.</p><figure id="figure-qzlupcu5vlrute2ft"><img id="qzlupcu5vlrute2ft" src="https://cdn.durable.co/shutterstock/30lRjNynYd9KY0SI3vgMurNQWKjgHWJ2c9qQPHqXNSiAFS5D9YBo0tAgOGbKiurx.jpeg" alt="Stethoscope represents the health / red heart as a representation of the blood system. Bring it to show that good health. Health care on wooden floor
" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionX="null" data-positionY="null" data-fullWidth="false"/></figure><h2>6. Increased Energy Levels</h2><p>Regular physical activity can boost energy levels and combat fatigue, which is a common complaint among men over 40. Exercise improves blood flow and oxygen delivery to the muscles, enhancing overall energy levels and reducing feelings of tiredness.</p><figure id="figure-43hvyde73ilrute2ft"><img id="43hvyde73ilrute2ft" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1515191107209-c28698631303?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxlbmVyZ3klMjBsZXZlbHMlMjBleGVyY2lzZXxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MDYyODM5MTl8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="energy levels exercise" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1515191107209-c28698631303?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxlbmVyZ3klMjBsZXZlbHMlMjBleGVyY2lzZXxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MDYyODM5MTl8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>7. Weight Management</h2><p>As metabolism naturally slows down with age, weight management can become more challenging. Engaging in regular exercise helps to burn calories, build lean muscle mass, and maintain a healthy weight. It also increases metabolism, making it easier to manage weight in the long term.</p><figure id="figure-12fyq9on5lrute2ft"><img id="12fyq9on5lrute2ft" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1486218119243-13883505764c?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHx3ZWlnaHQlMjBtYW5hZ2VtZW50JTIwZXhlcmNpc2V8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA2MjgzOTE5fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="weight management exercise" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1486218119243-13883505764c?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHx3ZWlnaHQlMjBtYW5hZ2VtZW50JTIwZXhlcmNpc2V8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA2MjgzOTE5fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>8. Social Interaction and Stress Relief</h2><p>Exercise provides an excellent opportunity for men over 40 to socialize and connect with others. Joining a sports team, participating in group fitness classes, or even going for a walk with friends can help reduce feelings of isolation and provide a sense of community. Additionally, exercise is a great way to relieve stress and improve overall mental well-being.</p><figure id="figure-0np262yadjlrute2ft"><img id="0np262yadjlrute2ft" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1588196749597-9ff075ee6b5b?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxzb2NpYWwlMjBpbnRlcmFjdGlvbiUyMGV4ZXJjaXNlfGVufDB8fHx8MTcwNjI4MzkxOXww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="social interaction exercise" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1588196749597-9ff075ee6b5b?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxzb2NpYWwlMjBpbnRlcmFjdGlvbiUyMGV4ZXJjaXNlfGVufDB8fHx8MTcwNjI4MzkxOXww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><p>In conclusion, exercise offers numerous benefits for men over 40, ranging from improved heart health and increased muscle mass to enhanced mental well-being and reduced risk of chronic diseases. By incorporating regular physical activity into their routine, men can significantly improve their overall quality of life and enjoy the many advantages that exercise brings.</p>

The Benefits of Exercise for Men Over 45

Yoga practice helps find harmony and balance. Man practicing yoga black and white. Reached peace of mind. Meditation and yoga concept. Yoga helps find balance and unite with nature.

<p>```html</p><p>Midlife can be a challenging time for many men as they navigate through various life changes, including career shifts, family responsibilities, and physical health concerns. In the midst of these transitions, it's crucial for men to prioritize their mental and emotional well-being. One effective way to achieve this is by embracing the practice of mindfulness.</p><p>Mindfulness involves being fully present in the moment and acknowledging one's thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations without judgment. It's a powerful tool that can help men cultivate a greater sense of self-awareness and cope with the stress and uncertainty that often accompany midlife.</p><figure id="figure-wcqfba8nvilrktb1ca"><img id="wcqfba8nvilrktb1ca" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1499728603263-13726abce5fd?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxtaW5kZnVsbmVzcyUyMG1pZGxpZmV8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1Njc5MTE1fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="mindfulness midlife" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1499728603263-13726abce5fd?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxtaW5kZnVsbmVzcyUyMG1pZGxpZmV8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1Njc5MTE1fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h3>The Benefits of Mindfulness in Midlife</h3><p>Embracing mindfulness can have a profound impact on men's midlife wellness. By incorporating mindfulness practices into their daily routines, men can experience a range of benefits, including:</p><ol><li>Reduced stress and anxiety levels</li><li>Improved emotional regulation</li><li>Enhanced focus and concentration</li><li>Greater resilience in the face of challenges</li></ol><figure id="figure-r9vyn051lflrktb1ca"><img id="r9vyn051lflrktb1ca" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1603110469647-af950ea74363?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw1M3x8bWluZGZ1bG5lc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1NjkyOTU4fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="brown wooden dock on body of water during daytime" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="null" data-positiony="null" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1603110469647-af950ea74363?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw1M3x8bWluZGZ1bG5lc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1NjkyOTU4fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"></figure><h3>Practical Ways to Cultivate Mindfulness</h3><p>There are various approaches that men can take to integrate mindfulness into their midlife wellness routines. Some effective strategies include:</p><ul><li>Engaging in regular meditation or deep breathing exercises</li><li>Practicing mindful movement activities such as yoga or tai chi</li><li>Engaging in nature walks or spending time in outdoor settings</li><li>Utilizing mindfulness apps or guided meditations</li></ul><figure id="figure-7w67fo2fl9lrktb1ca"><img id="7w67fo2fl9lrktb1ca" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1512438248247-f0f2a5a8b7f0?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxM3x8bWluZGZ1bG5lc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1NjkyOTQ0fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="man sitting on cliff" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="null" data-positiony="null" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1512438248247-f0f2a5a8b7f0?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxM3x8bWluZGZ1bG5lc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1NjkyOTQ0fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;"></figure><h3>Seeking Support and Resources</h3><p>It's important for men to recognize that embracing mindfulness is not a sign of weakness, but rather a proactive step towards holistic well-being. Seeking support from mental health professionals, joining mindfulness groups, or participating in workshops can provide valuable guidance and encouragement on this journey.</p><figure id="figure-yxunwslvlrktb1ca"><img id="yxunwslvlrktb1ca" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1599744403700-b7330f3c4dbe?crop=entropy&cs=tinysrgb&fit=max&fm=jpg&ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw5N3x8bWluZGZ1bG5lc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzA1NjkzNDI4fDA&ixlib=rb-4.0.3&q=80&w=1080" alt="man in crew neck t-shirt standing on grass field in grayscale photography" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-lg md:rounded-xl lg:rounded-2xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionX="null" data-positionY="null"/></figure><p>By prioritizing mindfulness in midlife, men can cultivate a greater sense of balance, resilience, and overall well-being as they navigate the unique challenges and opportunities that arise during this stage of life.</p><p>```</p>

Blog

Nothin'...... A Recipe for Life

3 Months in Nepal: Ascendance, Adventure, and Acceptance

Hey Positivity Gurus, F**k You! Stop Being So Unempathetic

My Midlife Gap Decade: Retire Retirement and Redefine Mid...

The Benefits of Exercise for Men Over 45

The Importance of Mindfulness in Men's Midlife Wellness